For the Children

Posted by Michelle

Over the course of my lifetime, I have heard various politicians advocate the importance of adopting their policies "for the children". Few things can manipulate a group of American adults into supporting spending for something faster than to threaten the welfare of the children if a program is not adopted. After all, most of us want our children and grandchildren to have better than what we had. They deserve nothing less than the best we can afford to give them.

That is a good point to ponder. Our children deserve nothing less than the best we can afford to give them. Is going into debt to a level that few of us can even mentally comprehend really giving our children the best we can afford? What exactly is a trillion dollars, anyway? Is borrowing exponential sums of money from countries with which we have adversarial relationships such as China really giving our children the best we can afford? Isn't China still a communist country with deplorable practices in regards to human rights?

Watching the reckless budget spending and deficits coming out of our politicians lately has made me question what exactly we are doing "for the children". As a mom, I am concerned that we are bankrupting our children before they even graduate from high school. As a mom, I question whether our children will have enough working years left to work for their own retirement by the time they finish working to support the retirements of their parents and grandparents. As a mom, I wonder if I will have to one day describe to my grandchildren the freedom and opportunity that I took for granted when I was a child.

I am not a politician. I have no candidate's political agenda in mind. I love my country, and I love my children. I would like to see our politicians adopt budgets that actually balance. I understand the choices will not be easy, but I would rather cut programs and benefits today than continue to spend money that our children cannot even earn enough in their lifetimes to cover. I am willing to sacrifice today to ensure that the nation our children inherit from us is at least as financially secure as the one that we inherited. As a mom, this is one of the things that I would like to do "for the children". How about you?

Learning to Laugh

Posted by Michelle

In the last few years since becoming a mother, I have had the opportunity to experience many events that were frustrating at the time and hilarious later. I could tell you stories that would make you cry from laughing so hard. As I have lived through each of these trying moments, I have faced a choice to either lose my temper or just laugh. I must admit that I have not always chosen the latter. Here is a story I thought you might find mildly amusing that happened recently in our home.

In order to truly appreciate the story, a little background information is needed. A few weeks ago on Christmas morning, my toddler received a really fun toy. This really fun toy has a big button on the side just perfect for his chubby little hand to push and make play the inordinately loud jingle. He loves this toy and pushes that button several times at random throughout the day. And no, there is no off button. That jingle is never far from my thoughts. Are you beginning to get the picture?

Now, fast-forward to last Friday. As we arrived home from our errands late Friday morning, I happened to glance in my rear-view mirror and noticed that my toddler had fallen asleep in his car seat. My heart sank as I recognized that this little ten minute catnap almost certainly spelled doom for the afternoon nap that I and so many other moms of small children cherish as a priceless treasure. As I opened the van door, his little eyes popped open. There was nothing to be done now, so we continued on with our routine. We put the groceries away, ate lunch, prepared for naps, and read aloud from the children's book we are reading.

I knew I was in trouble as I finished reading the second chapter of the book and looked down into the big eyes of my wide-awake toddler staring back up at me with a grin on his face. Normally, he does not even make it through the first chapter before falling fast asleep. I admitted defeat, tucked the other children in for their naps, and took my toddler out to rock in the living room. I rocked softly. I rocked feverishly. I cuddled him closely. I released him to sit up. Back and forth we danced. He tried to do everything in his power to stay awake, and I tried to do everything in my power to get him to fall asleep. We both knew he was sleepy. I knew how cranky he would be later if the only nap he got that day was the ten-minute nap earlier in the van.

After an hour or so of hard labor, my little cherub finally fell asleep. I rocked him contentedly for another half an hour to ensure a good, deep sleep. As I carried him to bed, I was greeted with the wide-awake faces of his siblings. Of course, by this time it was time for them to get up. You moms out there will recognize that I had missed my window for a break. Oh, well, at least my toddler would not be cranky that evening. I gave each of the older children the go-ahead to get up but shot them warning looks to make a quiet departure and not wake the toddler. The children solemnly shook their heads and began to quietly climb out of their beds. I gave them one last look to ensure they realized certain annihilation awaited the maker of any noise that would wake baby brother before returning my attention to the task at hand.

Some of you are aware of the delicate procedure of trying to place a sleeping toddler in bed without awaking him, and here is where the information that I presented earlier about my toddler's new Christmas toy comes into play. I turned to gently rest my little boy's sleeping form in his bed when I accidentally kicked something hard hidden under his bed. That loud, annoying jingle erupted and shattered the quiet as my foot hit the big button on the side. My toddler's eyes burst open, and he immediately began to scream in terror at being jerked so rudely from a sound sleep. To their credit my older children never made a sound.

I looked down at my wailing toddler and then up at the pale faces of my other children as they froze waiting for my response. Now, I must admit that I was frustrated and that I may have reacted differently a few years and a couple of children ago, but the irony was not lost to me on this day. All I could do was throw my head back and laugh hysterically as I scooped up my toddler to comfort him. My other children gathered around me with relieved faces to join my laughter and offer additional comfort to their baby brother.

I cannot tell you how thankful I am that I chose to laugh instead of lose my temper. I am not saying that the rest of the evening was a piece of cake. My toddler was whiny and clingy, which I'm sure is everyone's favorite combination for a child to be. He only wanted to be held until it was finally bedtime. He went off to sleep without a fuss. As I gazed down at his peaceful form snuggly asleep in his bed, I smiled contentedly. I am so thankful that I am learning to laugh.

What are some frustrating events that you have learned to laugh at in your life?

Most Likely to Succeed

Posted by Michelle

When I was a senior in high school, my fellow classmates voted to bestow upon me the title of "Most Likely to Succeed." While I knew that this was simply a gesture, it was nice to be recognized by my peers. I spent the next few years working hard and chasing after my definition of success. I was driven as I completed my college degree in three years and used my fourth year to earn a masters degree. Who could say that I was not successful?

My husband and I finished college, and I began my first career. I worked very hard in my first job. I was appreciated by my employers and well-liked by my co-workers. I spent long hours at the office when required. I did what was needed to get the job done. Within my first six months with the company, my employers were discussing the possibility of management with me. I beamed with pride. After all, wasn't I successful?

Through the course of events in my life, God shook things up and I landed with another employer in a smaller company in a little town. I was very happy in this position. I still worked hard when the need arose, but I enjoyed a more relaxed atmosphere. My employer treated me fairly, and we got along well. After several years, I began to entertain the possibility of a partnership somewhere down the road. The opportunity excited me. Could this be the definition of success?

By this time, my "biological clock", as it were, was beginning to kick in. Mark and I were happily married and settled into our own home. We were comfortable in our church and our community. But as Mark and I contemplated the possibility of having a baby, I worried about my job. I began to throw little trial balloons out to my employer to get his impression and was delighted with his positive response. My employer had two small children at the time and maintained a family-friendly atmosphere at work. Another co-worker had just had her second baby and was working part-time. I entertained the option of doing the same, but could I be a success at both?

I will never forget the day that I held my first precious little baby in my arms. He stole my heart as every other responsibility seemed to pale in comparison with taking care of him. I relished my six weeks of maternity leave and even spent the first four months of his life working part-time, some from home. However, the busy season came, and I returned full-time to work. I found myself, again, working hard to get the job done. But this time was different. My heart wasn't in it. I struggled to focus, and I worried that I was not giving my best to either my employer or my baby. Could I succeed in juggling a baby and a career?

This tension dominated my life for the next two months. Finally, I can remember one late night at work sitting in front of my computer as I began to cry. Every ounce of me screamed out to be with my baby. I was struck with the fact that someone else could do my job at the office just as well as I could, but no one else could ever love my little baby as much as his daddy and me. Somewhere in the struggle, I finally came to peace with the fact that I could not achieve my definition of success with both my career and my baby. I completed my obligation to my employer to finish out the busy season and left my job when my baby was eight months old. I will never forget my first day at home after quitting my job. I can remember sitting in my rocker wondering what I should do next. What was required to be successful in my new career?

I found staying at home with my baby to be rewarding but different. It was not long before Mark and I welcomed another little boy into our family. A few years later, we had a little girl. And a few years after that, God blessed us with a third little boy. There are no offers of management or possibilities of partnership in my new career. I must confess that I have struggled with issues of worth and value as I have wiped noses and bottoms. I have wondered at the unexpected turn my life has taken. Could I still possibly be considered successful?

There have been times when I have questioned God as to why I could not be at peace in my heart with both motherhood and a career. The simple fact is that I could not. So, with a change in career has come a change in my definition of success. I still hold big dreams in my heart for the future, but I am totally committed to my career of motherhood for this priceless season of my life. And thanks to my peers in high school for voting me "Most Likely to Succeed." You were absolutely right!

What is your definition of success?